Archive for the ‘Rambling’ Category
I read an amusing article over at the NYT. It’s about couples and attraction. A recent study compared attractiveness of people (in a couple with each other) and found a correlation between how long the pair had known one another to a disparity in their relative attractiveness. Here’s an excerpt:
“When the ratings for partners were compared, there was a clear pattern based on how long the people had known one another before they had begun dating.
If they’d begun going out within a month of meeting, then they tended to be equally attractive physically. But if they’d been acquaintances for a long time, or if they’d been friends before becoming lovers, then someone hot was more liable to end up with someone not so hot.”
HA! Give it a read HERE. It’s worth it.
Cati and I knew each other as light friends/acquaintances and later, email pen-pals, for about 4 years and there was no romance of which to speak during that time– ok, maybe a little flirting, but it was really tame. I had a girlfriend when we first met and she was still at the convent working with blind orphans (or whatever it is that our wives and mothers-of-our-children did before they met us husbands ;) ). This is what I tell myself, anyway.
After over ten years together; I often think about how much of a role good ol’ fashioned luck has had in our relationship (well, so far, anyway). [knocks on wood]
Btw, don’t let the title of this post fool you; I know I am the symmetrically challenged plebeian Elizabeth to her dashing, high-society Darcy.
The question is– if you knew your spouse for a long time before starting a romantic relationship; are you the ugly one? On the other hand, if you two were hot and heavy within a month of meeting one another, you’re probably of equal physical desireability.
Food for thought, indeed. Natually, feel free to comment down below. Unless of course you’re the ugly one in the relationship, in that case, we all understand your aversion to leaving a comment, you poor thing). ;)
Oh, and if you’re not in a relationship at the moment, the data says to take your time picking a partner– your feelings will likely change on that person over the first few months of knowing him/her.
Just look at these two grinning fools as a new couple in 2004:
Ever notice how we sometimes resent the things that are closer to what we prefer than the things that are farther. It’s as though we feel there is a sick perversion to getting close but not quite there. I have often chuckled about football hooligans who beat other football hooligans at a match they both attend because one of them favors a team based 90 miles away from the other. Wouldn’t they both be more productive to collude and kick the living snot out of, say, baseball fans who don’t like soccer at all.
Sometimes Cati and I will squabble like two old crows over some fine point in an argument. It’s as though we are saying, “How can you be so ‘almost right’ and not ‘get it.’ You must be particularly, ahem, ‘impaired’ to not see the OBVIOUS CONCLUSION upon which you have practically landed. Your inability to make the right conclusion is an affront to my thought process and cheapens my perspective. AAAARGH!” Of course we are never that civil and articulate in the throes of a heated debate. Especially if it’s a dinner conversation with wine. :)
I even notice this phenomena with little personal preferences like when I hear a song I like. Then, for no good reason, in the middle of this otherwise perfect song, there’s a wailing saxophone solo, or some other terrible intrusion, and I’m like “WHAT THE HECK IS THIS?” And I immediately dislike the song strongly. It’s 95% right, but terrible. It’s a funny thing, innit?
It’s particularly obvious (and not funny) when adherents to Abrahamic religions kill each other. It’s like– “Guys, you practically agree!” But it’s the difference in the details that makes all the difference sometimes. Like the old saying goes, “Don’t make ‘perfect’ the enemy of ‘good’.”
Speaking of things I don’t hate– this song/video makes me nostalgic for the ’70s. Actually several Stranglers songs have this effect.
It makes me miss something I never really knew. Not sure what though.
Looking at this video it’s easy to see from where the Star Wars set designers drew their inspiration, eh?
That is all.